How Does A Zombie Taste?

Zombie TongueIt is a scientific fact that one must have a tongue in order to utter the word “brains”. Lacking a licker, you can only attempt a lesser approximation like “bramff”.

These pictures, taken from the Spooky Blue Zombie Builder’s Guide V2.0 (currently under development), show an unusual – um … aperture detail that not a lot of people would think (or want) to add. This zed possesses a tongue, with which he can amble up to any wrecked ambulance, grab the mic, and clearly say, “send more brains.”

Okay, I admit it. I never actually set out to make a tongue of the dead; the protuberance was a side effect of the mush-stuffing phase. If you dig this sort of thing, though…

Start with a screaming paper mache skull. Before filling it with mush, foam, or wadded up newspaper (my new favorite, and cheapest of all skull-mush material), make a duct tape dam or wall to separate the brain cavity from the mouth area. Since our brains and mouths often have no clear connection to one another anyway, this should be familiar territory.

Duct tape your zombie's mouth from the insideFill your skull with mush, leaving the mouth empty. Next, place more duct tape under the chin so that it sticks to the jaw bone, but hangs down a little bit like a pelican, or the unnervingly loose neck-skin of my junior year psychology teacher who pronounced “polygamy” as two distinct words; “polly” “gammy”. I believe he was also active in the hog farming industry.

If you look inside the mouth of your pelican-ated zombie, you should see the sticky side of the tape. Press a wad or two of newspaper underneath the chin, pushing the tape upwards and forming a lump inside the mouth. When you’re satisfied, tape off anything that might fall off, and this skull is ready to skin.

Here are a few more SBZBGV2.0 pictures. I originally posted these in order to talk about undead skin, but then I saw that horrible tongue. Gaa.

8 Responses to “How Does A Zombie Taste?”

  1. Have you been consuming energy drinks? Your hand certainly makes it look that way…

  2. Heh. These came from a section detailing dry-brush technique. Just call me Flash.

  3. Haha, best Post title ever….. and coming in at close second, the phrase “pelican-ated zombie”.

    Awesomeness.

  4. Very cool.

  5. Hey, I’m thinking about Easter decorations and now I want to go make a zombie with a tongue. Probably not appropriate for Easter but I am going to start early for Halloween this year since I have been inspired by your site. Thanks, Pam

  6. It seems he even has enough lips to make the “b” sound in “brains.”
    You think of every detail.
    We ARE NOT WORTHY!
    Great job.

  7. Hawk Girl,
    “Think” is a strong word. “Dumb luck” plays such a role in my life that he’ll get his own line when the closing credits roll at the funeral.
    But thanks for the happy feel-goods. In all caps, too. Wow!

    Dawn gets the prize for first to apply a meme on the Hoot, though purists (mega nerds) will argue it should have read “evar” or “evah”. :)

    Pam, I can’t think of a better way to take the saccharin sweetness out of Easter than with a Gene Simmons zombie terrorizing a basketful of Peeps.

  8. Right on. Turn the peeps into mush! I don’t like them anyway. Yuck! But what about a ZOMBIE BUNNY??? Cool? Ya gives me an idea. Corps of the Killer Bunny.