There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people: religion, politics, and the Great Pumpkin.
“I got a rock.”
You’re sitting on the edge of the couch, legs kicking excitedly, a Wrapple mashed up against your face. It was hard to eat those things without getting caramel all over, but boy were they good. The perfect treat to get you through to the first commercial break of the event you’ve been anticipating all day. And it’s finally here. The Halloween TV Special.
You remember watching this same cartoon last year, but you don’t really recall the details. It was sooo long ago. Age hasn’t yet begun its compression trick whereby time is dilated just a twitch each year, the cumulative effects being much more keenly felt when we reach our ‘4os and thereafter. That faraway era that was last year is lost in the dark ages and is of no concern. The important thing is that the music has started and the next 30 minutes (longer if you’re lucky and a second special comes on next) is focussed on your favorite day of the year.
The best specials are the ones that are actually written to be for and about Halloween. However, there are those opportunists that attempt to compile a Halloween special, Looney Toons being the worst offender.
It doesn’t really matter to you as you lick Space Dust from your fingers that you’ve already seen the “abracadabra – hocus pocus” routine between Bugs Bunny and Count Bloodcount a thousand times and can recite it in your sleep. It’s a good cartoon! “You wouldn’t hit a bat with glasses, would you?” Heh…classic. But somehow you’re vaguely offended by what you know to be a counterfeit.
Nevertheless, you won’t be distracted. The Dolly Madison commercial makes everything better. Do we have any Zingers?
At any other time if asked whether you’d like a Hostess HoHo or a chocolate Zinger you’d choose the Ho Ho without a second thought. But Charlie Brown and Snoopy are so persuasive. You’d trade your Bigwheel for a box of Zingers and a glass of milk right now.
Back to the show. It’s Halloween! For a few more minutes it’s Halloween. The air feels different, electrified. The shadows are more purple and anything orange simply glows. A tiny shiver runs up your spine like a spider’s kiss, and anyone who doesn’t think candy corn has a smell is crazy because mom just opened a bag and brought you a little bowl of your own and it smells like October should.
You sit back. Charlie Brown gets a rock.
Heh…classic.