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Our friend Frankenstein recently took a trip to New England to enjoy all that this little piece of heaven has to offer.  He enjoyed his vacation despite the torch-wielding villagers and this one jerk in an antique store in Concord who he had to step on for being obnoxious and talking too loudly on his cell phone.
Arriving in Boston and driving from the airport is the equivalent of being strapped to the roof of a Tilt-a-whirl car running full-blast and packed with heckling monkeys.  So, it's no surprise that the next day Frank chose a rather sedate activity. The Davis Mega Maze in Sterling, MA proved to be fun, though the massive migrating herds of families with children and uncles and fanny packs and strollers all in tow lessened the overall quality of the experience.  Perhaps it would be better to avoid the maze on weekends.  Lunch was delicious, hot buttered corn on the cob.

Of the day, Frankenstein said, "Mmerrrrrrgghh!"

The drive back into Boston that evening was the low point of the trip.  Bostonians are wonderful, gregarious people, but there's something about a steering wheel that turns off the rational part of their brains.  Anyway, as night fell, it was time to meet up with a tour group and the funny and informative Jim McCabe of New England Ghost Tours.  Frank thoroughly enjoyed the night-time tour and the spooky stories.  A highlight was back-door access to the haunted spiral staircase at Cheers (the Bull & Finch Pub).  Everyone had his picture taken in front of the Cheers sign, but Frank's was out of focus.

For those visiting Boston, Frankenstein recommends New England Ghost Tours.  Of Jim McCabe, Frankenstein said, "Mmerrrrrrgghh!"

Salem, MA was simply beautiful.  From the picturesque wharf to the many attractions, Frank enjoyed it so much that he came back later in the week. Even so, he didn't get to see half of everything there was to see.  Among his many destinations was the Salem Witch Museum and Red's Sandwich Shop.  Frank recommends the beef tips.

Night-time ghost tours are a thriving business in both Boston and Salem.  There are many to choose from, and that's good because Frank found Mollie Stewart of Spellbound Tours to be arrogant and aloof.  Her minion, on the other hand, -the woman who actually ran the tour- was both amiable and informative if not a little loopy.  Frank was understandably drawn to her.  Perhaps by the family resemblance evidenced in this most unfortunate photograph above.

Overall, Salem was the favorite destination of the entire trip.  When asked if he would be returning someday, Frankenstein said, "Mmerrrrrrgghh!"

By mid week, Frank was getting tired of driving everywhere.  It is a fact that when you arrive in Boston and pick up your rental car, you are assigned a "guy".  This person's job is to ride as close to your rear bumper as possible for your entire visit.  Now, you might not always have the same "guy".  They switch off.  We believe that their function is to remind you that no matter how bad the traffic or the drivers where you live, they're worse in Boston.

So Frank did some walking instead, visiting Concord's surrounds, Sleepy Hollow Cemetery, and the North Bridge.  He commented on the deep sense of pride he felt visiting these historic places, especially the North Bridge. Here is where Minute Men faced the British army, the place where those first shots of the revolution were "heard round the world".  Frankenstein reflected, "Mmerrrrrrgghh!"

Frank's b&b was in West Concord, well outside the ring of terror that is the Boston metropolitan highway system.  Rather than drive back into Boston for a final foray into the Quincy Market and a walk along the Freedom Trail, Frank decided instead to go back to Salem and ride the ferry.  This proved to be much more fun and relaxing.   Frank was able to unwind and enjoy his visit to the Old North Church instead of dreading the drive home or a subway ride to some weird place called Alewife Station.  He later learned that an alewife is a fish.

The Old North Church, also known as Christ Church, was the second Anglican church to be built in Boston; the first being King's Chapel in 1686.  This part of the trip was especially moving for Frankenstein who summed up the day, "Mmerrrrrrgghh!"

There were simply too many things to do in one week, so Frank will probably come back one day.  In fact, it was all he talked about for days after arriving back home again.

"Mmerrrrrrgghh!" said Frankenstein.